Paul Landry

And I’m nervous, because I’m afraid of cops. I always thought I was most afraid of bears, but at least if a bear kills you everyone gets mad at the bear. If a cop kills you, 30% of Americans are like, “it’s a hard job.” —Mike Birbiglia: Thank God for Jokes (2017) @ 26:18.

“Fool Us” is, in other words, an island of civility and generosity in our cruel, contentious and otherwise debased times. Letter of Recommendation: ‘Penn & Teller: Fool Us’

Often when I’m feeling tense or worked up, I go back and read Perfect by Jim Coudal. By the time I’m finished, I’m feeling better; sometimes good enough to partake of the sacrament, although—and I don’t mean to blaspheme—I personally almost always prefer a Gibson to a Martini.

That’s right: “At the same time that Democrats are holding impeachment inquiries to determine if President Donald Trump abused his executive power, they apparently have no qualms about letting him continue to spy on Americans” Reason Roundup

“But one thing is clear: Republicans aren’t Democrats and hate anybody who is, and Democrats feel the same about Republicans.” Mutual Hatred Is All Democrats and Republicans Have to Offer

“In the 2017 fiscal year, FedEx owed more than $1.5 billion in taxes. The next year, it owed nothing. What changed was the Trump administration’s tax cut — for which the company had lobbied hard.” How FedEx Cut Its Tax Bill to $0

“That it took barely 12 hours to issue the punishments spoke to how distasteful the NFL considered the episode. But it also shows just how hypocritical and uncaring the league is when it comes to domestic violence and sexual abuse.” NFL again shows its hypocrisy

“In a major victory for privacy rights at the border, a federal court in Boston ruled today that suspicionless searches of travelers’ electronic devices by federal agents at airports and other U.S. ports of entry are unconstitutional.” EFF: Federal Court Rules Suspicionless Searches of Travelers’ Phones and Laptops Unconstitutional

Australia had an unusually dry day. For the first time in recorded history, not a drop fell on the entire continent.” QUARTZ DAILY BRIEF FROM NOVEMBER 12, 2019

“Everyone is entitled to their religious beliefs, but religious beliefs do not include a license to discriminate, to deny essential care, or to cause harm to others.” FEDERAL COURT STRIKES DOWN TRUMP ADMINISTRATION RULE ALLOWING REFUSALS IN HEALTH CARE

Really loving my AirPods Pro. I’m… what? What? No, I can’t hear you, let me switch to Transparency mode!

xkcd: Emulation

“Every decision the City of Memphis has made throughout this process has been thoughtful and most importantly, legal” Tennessee Supreme Court won’t hear appeal in Memphis Confederate statue removal, paving way for relocation

“Hey Darryl.”

“Hey Darryl.”

“What?!”

“Coal mining and truck driving are not exactly jobs of the future, so add Carrara subway tile to my fucking shopping list!”

—Randy Marsh to Darryl Weathers, South Park S21E01, “White People Renovating Houses” (2017).

“Years after surveillance reforms, federal personnel can’t seem to comply with the Fourth Amendment.” The Same FBI That Wants To Destroy Encryption Is Still Illegally Snooping on Americans

“Contrary to what the judge thinks, the only thing that has been made clear is just how ludicrously cruel our criminal justice system can be.” 21-Year-Old Oversleeps, Misses Jury Duty, and Goes to Jail for 10 Days

R.I.P. Ginger Baker Ginger Baker, Powerhouse Jazz-Rock Drummer for Cream, Dies at 80

“A recurring theme throughout Donald Trump’s presidency has been his inability to distinguish between the interests of the country and the interests of Donald Trump.” Reason Roundup

Nashville Scene: Tennessee’s Congressional Republicans Think You’re Stupid

xkcd: Drone Fishing

“Stanley Nelson […] does the finest job possible of showcasing an incredible array of accomplishments, while neither deifying or sanitizing the legend at its center.” Birth of the Cool Accurately Depicts One of Jazz’s Most Brilliant, Complex Individuals

“On a scale of 1 to 100, how many words do you know?” — Zach Galifianakis to Keanu Reeves, Between Two Ferns: The Movie.

“You’ve proved tonight you’re not just a great athlete […] you’re also a great sport […] and you’re an inspiration to Republican, transgender, Olympic decathlon winners everywhere…” — Jeff Ross to Caitlyn Jenner, The Comedy Central Roast of Alec Baldwin, 9.15.2019

“I’m on an all protein diet, but I’m also doing carbs.”

“Ok. I want a grande, triple non-fat, half-decaf, soy milk, French roast, caramel cappuccino. Ok? Now, with just a splash, ok? Just a splash of hazelnut. Ok? And orange extract. The extra foam in a separate cup. I’ll have to spoon it on myself, ‘cause y’all never get it right.”